Disassembled

I fell apart on the subway this week.
It was a dreadful scene, really.

Parts of me went everywhere,
Scattering around the subway car,

Rolling across people’s feet,
Bouncing around on that icky floor.

One of my arms landed
In a sweet old lady’s shopping bag,

Right next to a loaf of french bread.
She didn’t even notice.

I was so embarrassed, my cheeks turned red,
But she didn’t see because

My head had already split off,
Rolled to the back of the car,

Bumping into shoes and ankles,
Bruising my nose, my cheeks,

But I wasn’t able to shout,
Because my lungs weren’t connected,

So I can’t blame those people for kicking me.
They didn’t know any better.

This isn’t the first time this has happened.
Every once in a while,

I start to feel all bottled up inside,
And I know it’s about to happen again.

I’m going to fall to pieces,
Little bits of me here and there, disassembled.

There will be tears, of course,
But crying won’t make a bit of difference.

The doctors haven’t come up
With a name for it yet, but they will.

I don’t think they truly understand it yet.
Maybe one day, a doctor will go to pieces

In the grocery store,
Or while he’s talking to a patient,

And then he’ll take the time to give
This horrible condition a name,

Solve the mystery for the rest of us.
Maybe it goes back to Ancient Greece,

Or the Egyptians. Maybe somewhere,
In a hieroglyph carved in stone,

There’s a picture of a person,
Man or woman, it can happen to anyone,

With their limbs scattered all about,
Sadness in their eyes,

A look on their face that says,
“Help me. I’m lonely and lost

And I need someone to take notice.
I need someone to put me back together.”

Who knows? Maybe one day
This will happen to you.

If it does, the key is, don’t panic.
It will pass, with time.

The human body is a remarkable thing,
Capable of all sorts of miracles,

And over time the limbs naturally
Attract one another, draw closer,

And reconnect. It takes a while,
But eventually you’ll go back to normal,

Like nothing ever happened, almost,
No scars, if you’re among the lucky ones.

Your friends and family won’t understand,
And they’ll forget all about it in time,

But you’ll never forget.
It will always be in the back of your mind.

No matter what happens,
Or how much you tell yourself it’s all better,

From then on,
You’ll always remember

How it
Felt to

Fall
Apart.

31 thoughts on “Disassembled

  1. I read this to a young man just now who is putting things back together after his first break. As he got out of the vehicle at his house, he stopped, turned around and made a show of searching the van for something, looked in at me and said, “I think I have all of me, but if you find something I missed under the seat, could you bring it by later? I’ll probably need it.” It was the first glimmer of humor and the first smile I’ve seen from him in the month we’ve been working together. Thanks!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. I love this and find I’m deeply encouraged and a bit relieved that the limbs are naturally attracted to one another and will come together again. You’ve captured a feeling I’ve certainly had, but your poem didn’t leave me fractured, and I’m grateful for that. Really lovely.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh yes……and all the King’s horses and all the King’s men, couldn’t put……………..back together again.
    Know that feeling, but you’re right, the pieces are elastic and we can pull them back together, though for a while they may feel a bit dangely.

    Terrific poem.

    Liked by 1 person

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